The War Against Self-hating Bullshit

*So here is my feble attempt at free verse poetry – I’m not 100% proud of it looking back, but I was when I wrote it, so I guess that’s what counts. I hope that you like it! And if not, well, not really my problem*

Self-hating bullshit.

Sorry, how else would you put it?

When demonic voices of unknown origin

Yell at you, scream at you

Telling you those things you try to keep out:

Fat.

Ugly.

Worthless.

Lied to.

Not special enough for anyone to try to.

 

But imagine reaching inside

And pulling out a cage.

And what’s held inside

Is what this war against is waged.

 

A soul.

A beautiful, crystal-clear, shining white soul.

 

But it’s trapped.

Tied down by thoughts and words that are mapped

With the purpose to make sure you don’t find a lapse

To keep it there forever, always wrapped

Up in the things you can’t shake away.

 

Trapped.

 

But.

 

Only you hold the key to open the cage.

Instead of letting your soul die there, broken and afraid.

 

That key is self-worth.

Only you can bring your thoughts down to Earth.

Away from the hatred, the pain, and the hurt.

Maybe those voices provide some sort of comfort; a void, pit

That we can hide in, away from all of it.

But your soul won’t thank you.

No, not at all.

 

I’m not saying it’s easy to reach for that key.

Considering the prize, why should it be?

So many people are still trying for the key.

I should know.

 

Because one of them is me.

AF